Only focus on academics? Your child is behind.
Former President Roosevelt once said that we can’t prepare the future for our children but we can at least prepare them for the future. This sounds all good.
How exactly can we prepare our kids for the future? There is no manual that we can follow. There’s no secret recipe that guarantees the results. As parents or caregivers, we all want the best for our children. We want them to succeed in the future. We don’t want our kids to fall behind. So, we opt-in to do what we know and what everyone else is doing. Every year, American families spend over $200 billion on academic programs for better grades, after-school extracurricular engagement, sports, art, or coding camps for hobby enrichment. But are we preparing our kids for the future? The data shows otherwise.
73% of employers say that graduates lack “uniquely human” soft skills
As the college acceptance rate drops yearly, the admission offices look for students who can take care of the world.
In our quest to ensure our children’s success and readiness for the future, we may overlook an essential aspect of their development: soft skills.
What is soft skill?
Soft skills are non-technical skills, habits, and character traits that describe how one works and interacts with others. On the other hand, hard skills are technical and academic skills that we acquire in a subject (like math, reading, or coding). Unlike hard skills, soft skills are hard to quantify. They are called “soft” for a reason. They can even sometimes feel touchy and feely. The list can go on and on if you are to name soft skills.
Simply put, there are two categories of soft skills: inner strengths and outer capabilities. Inner strengths relate to character or self-management skills, including self-awareness, resilience, kindness, fearlessness, discipline, and positivity. Outer capabilities often involve more than one person, such as communication, negotiation, collaboration, empathy, and influence.
Why are soft skills so critical?
Think of someone you know who’s encompassing all the soft skills I list above. Who do you have in mind? I bet a 99.99% chance they are a leader in your organization, a person you admire, or a role model. You are not alone in thinking this way. According to a study by the Harvard Business Review, people with solid soft skills or social skills are more likely to get hired, receive promotions, earn higher salaries, and gain leadership positions.
The impact soft skills place is on more than just adult careers. It plays an essential role in child development from early childhood to college. Research has repeatedly shown that young kids with better soft skills have a much higher chance of school completion and academic achievements. Moreover, the earlier they develop those skills, the better they are served for the future, both academically and socially.
For example, kids with strong communication skills can build and maintain positive relationships with their peers and adults. As a result, this can lead to better social interactions, more opportunities for friendship, and a greater sense of belonging and self-esteem. Resilience and emotional management skills can help children navigate challenges and conflicts, whether in school or at home. Time management and organization skills allow kids to manage school work and schedule independently and effectively.
The GAP - Your child is not getting sufficient soft skill training at school.
You might wonder - I get it. Soft skill development is vital for my child’s preparation for the future. The school must be taking care of it. The reality is it’s far from enough.
Think about the curriculum your kids have. The primary courses are reading, math, language, social studies, and science from elementary school to college. The older they get, the more technical and hard skills they learn to find a job and succeed. Yet, a study of 278 non-technical undergraduate courses found that only five percent of syllabi mentioned soft skills in any capacity. Why? Because hard skills are easy to quantify and measure.
Soft skills, however, are qualitative and hard to standardize. It’s up to the teacher how they want to incorporate soft skill development into their classes. But soft skill development is not just a quiet corner to calm down our emotions. It’s not just getting in front of the class to speak. It’s not just a slogan that we are resilient. It needs to be systematically broken down, taught, practiced, and honed.
Our kids are not learning to develop soft skills in elementary, middle, high school, or even college. So how can they be ready to take on the future when they are expected to use soft skills to survive and thrive? No wonder 73% of employers say that graduates lack soft skills. No wonder college admission officers now put more emphasis on soft skills.
Parents, it’s on you to prepare your kids for the future by helping them gain soft skills.
As parents, we are potent creatures willing to do anything for our kids to have a good life. We must take on this responsibility if our kids are not taught to develop soft skills at school. Here are a few ways.
Be a role model: Kids are constantly observing their parents. They model how their parents behave and communicate. If you want your child to be fearless and not afraid of talking to strangers, you need to be comfortable conversing with strangers. If you want your child to be empathetic, you should model that by recognizing your child’s feelings. If you want your child to be resilient, you don’t give up or complain about your work or projects.
Be vulnerable with your kids: Truth be told, most parents also struggle with having exceptional soft skills. Their career suffers because of that. If you are not confident about being a perfect role model for your kids, it’s okay. Being vulnerable and honest with them is also a critical soft skill. Share why you value this soft skill and how you can work on it together. For example, do a 30-day no-complaint challenge with your kids or a “talk to stranger” competition in a store. There are many ways you can learn and be better together.
Surround your kids with people with good soft skills: We are the average of 5 people we hang out with. To train our kids with proper soft skills early, you can intentionally bring friends you admire with certain character traits. Or you can take your kids to conferences to get inspiration. I once met a dad who brought his boys to TEDx conferences so his kids could observe and learn how the presenters present.
Work with a leadership training center: If you have read this far, I am confident that you understand the importance of soft skill development for your kids. You also realize somebody must do something must be done before it’s too late. Even with that realization and your mentorship, your child will already be ahead for the future. If you don’t think this is enough. If you want holistic and systematic leadership training for your kids, we have designed programs to help them be ahead of the game.
Parents, are you ready to raise your kids as leaders?
